Pick your fight.

Your startup doesn't have a growth problem. It has a nobody-wants-this problem.

The iPhone isn't a better phone. It's a permission slip to belong.

The algorithm didn't radicalize you. Boredom did.

Your smart home isn't smart. It's a subscription with extra steps.

AI didn't take your job. A spreadsheet did, in 1994.

Crypto isn't back. It just never learned how to leave.

Self-care became a marketing category the day it stopped being free.

Nobody is 'touching grass.' They're just offline for an hour.

The group chat is the last good thing left on the internet.

Stop "finding your passion." It's the worst advice ever sold.

"Quiet quitting" is just doing the job you're paid for.

Your grocery bill isn't inflation anymore. It's just the new price.

The 'side hustle' is just a second job with worse hours and no benefits.

Open offices were about cheap rent, not collaboration.

The scandal wasn't the thong bikinis on that cruise. It was everyone back home who couldn't handle we had fun.